>Be me>15>Super Beta>some bitch is into me>I've never really talked to a girl>invite her over to watch star wars>fucking hot as shit out>parents out of town, I tell her that the air conditioning is broken and to wear light clothing>fucking lie, turn up all the fucking ac's in the house and hide all blankets>she comes over, complains its cold>start watching movie>she's fucking shivering>I offer her a drink, she wants water>get her fucking ice cold water>she is so fucking cold, starts getting pissy>eventually she gets so cold that she has to grab me for warmth>now thats how you get a girl to touch you
>be me>have Asian girlfriend >strict Asian parents>father is super traditional and doesn't like me all that much>pretty sure its because I'm white>don't allow me to stay overnight at their house>doesn't want me stuffing their ethnic daughter on his watch>seemsreasonable.jpg>we have only been dating for 3 weeks and Iv never broke this rule>until last night>we got really drunk and we decided to sleep at her place because it was a lot closer than mine>end up having really loud drunk sex>her room is in the basement so we thought no one could hear>we were wrong>In the morning we get up early so I can leave without a trace>as we're walking up the stairs I hear her dad call her name from the kitchen>shit>she tells me to go back into her room and wait until she figures something out>5 mins later she comes down and grabs me and says that everything is fine>tells me that I can just leave through the front door>doesn't tell me that her parents called her out for the loud sex noises they heard last night>walk upstairs and see her father standing by the front door holding the door open for me>fuck this is awkward>she leads me to the door in silence>her father is staring at me in anger>quickly put my shoes on>no one says a word>panic>put my arms around her father>the same arms that fucked his daughter last night>he stands their stiff as a board>doesn't accept my hug>go to walk out the door>turn back and look him straight in the eye>"Thanks"
>Be me
>Have waste disposal job, but I like it. It gets me fed.
>Virgin betafag
>Loner
>Very quiet and timid
>I'm told I have a face only a mother could love
>People are usually afraid of me, they think I'm creepy but I'm used to it at this point
Feelsbadman.png
>I just want to find a nice grill I can start a family with
>Then, I met her
>One day I'm hanging out on the side porch minding my own business, eating my breakfast.
>New neighbor girl is going all around the neighborhood introducing herself
>Haven't seen her yet but holy shit, when I do...
>Petit body
>Light dirty blonde hair
>Green/blue eyes
>Smile of a goddess
>Perfect skin
>Easy 10/10
>The kind of girl you see in movies and shit
>Didn't think these girls really existed
>Initiate pathetic alternate reality daydreams...
>Watch her from a distance as she gets closer and closer to my home
>I have no chance
>She will think I'm ugly
>Probably just avoid me altogether
>Panic mode
>Convince myself that I should just avoid any contact with her so I slink into the corner
>She reaches my home
>Spots me immediately
>Walks right over next to me and just smiles and stares
>Doesn't look scared or disgusted by me
>I'm too scared to do anything
>Just stare back, lost in her beautiful eyes
>Strangely intimate eye contact, doesn't even feel awkward
>"I've heard a lot about you anon... I know your type."
>Wat
>Just giggles and walks away with a cute little bounce in her step
>Datass
>I continue on with my pathetic life and go find something to eat, thinking about her all day, wishing I said something to her
>She comes back the next day out of no where and we end up hanging out
>Turns out her name is Nessa, shes Scandinavian or some shit
>She mostly talks and I listen to her
>She makes me forget about my looks
Feelsgoodman.mp4
>We just mess around all day doing whatever to pass the time
>We really understand each other on a level I've never felt, I don't need to say or do much
>She comes back the next day
>Picks me up and we travel around in her little electric car
>We go to stupid places but with her anything is fun
>We do stuff like this nearly everyday for weeks
>Weeks turn to months
>Feeling pretty comfortable with her now
>One day shes dropping me off back at my home but I don't want her to leave
>Start to playfully touch all over her hands and arms tickling her as I do so
>I could tell she was a little weirded out at first, but she got past it
>Didn't really bother me, I wasn't too attractive after all...
>Slowly move over to her tits and ass, every so lightly
>I'm all over her
>"Stop it anon, that tickles"
>She doesn't stop me
>Her laughter gets me going
>Shes loving it
>Primal instincts take over
>I bite her neck. Fucking hard.
>There's blood
>"OW!! SHIT ANON"
>She slaps me and I fall to the floor, confused as to what the fuck I just did
>Shes crying her eyes out now, wailing like a banshee
>"I knew I should have listened to Mrs. Jones!!! She said your type were dangerous!!!"
>MFW she is 8
>I fucking take off, running away as fast as I can
>She picks up a rock and throws it at me, killing me instantly
>MFW I am a spider
>Be me in highschool
>Beta doesn’t even begin to describe me
>My pockets were more productive than Strega Nona’s magic pot
>Constantly got bullied by this gorilla named Lawrence
>He’s neither a faggot nor a sailor but the quarterback (American football for the un-free)
>Everyone calls him the Law because he’s the big guy on campus
>One day on my way to trig Lawrence starts fucking with me
>His friends are egging him on
>He’s flicking my ear, shoving me and knocking books out of my hand
>This has been going on for about six months
>So I snapped
>I went full retard
>I challenge the six-foot two-hundred-pound 0% body fat quarterback to a fight with me, who makes the Endermen from Minecraft look morbidly obese
>He whoops my ass
>Everyone knows I challenged him so when the fight (if you can call him beating the shit out of me a fight) gets broken up he gets off scot-free
>The next day everyone’s talking about it
>”Anon fought the Law”
>I fought the Law and the Law won
>Be me>Highschool>Have betafag friend>(collects katanas/fedoras, has neckbeard, goes on /b/)>also has joint problems>help him ask out grill for proms>10/10 hot grill, prolly says yes out of pity>she does dance/cheerleading and shit>dinner goes alright, we go to fancy fuckin Italian place>large ass servings none of us finish>betafag asks for box>get to dance>friend is nervous to dance, but grill brings him up to dance> he put fucking leftovers in pockets>his knees weak, arms are heavy>food flying from his pockets already>luigis spaghetti>both elected to prom court>I cri, that’s mah boi>somehow manages to stick with her till after the dance, get to her house>they go upstairs>my boys gonna become a man>my date passed out on floor so I play Mario cart alone (no funsies for me)>friend comes running down screaming>when we flee I ask him whats wrong, she was absolutely gorgeous>he agrees, even though she was the dancing queen>young and sweet >she was also only fucking 17
>two days ago, sitting at home watching tv>knock at door>most beta fuck I've ever seen>over 6'>morbidly obese>MLP shirt>fucking scene from Minecraft tatted on his arm>asks about car parked in my driveway>tell him it's for sale>gives me his name and number and says he'll be back>comes by today>cash in hand>drives away in my college beater>smoke everywhere>several hours later I'm smoking a bowl, watching Parks & Rec>knock at the door>two cops standing on my porch>"you own an 83 chevy shitarina?">"sold it to a dweller this morning">find out it's in impound>beta boy was caught behind a safeway in the backseat>had purchased a watermelon in safeway>cut a small hole>was fucking it>cops laughed>I laughed>case closed>watermelon fucker is probably getting sex charges>mfw this is the first day my wife hasn't nagged me to get rid of the car>mfw I walk past the watermelon on my kitchen counter
