Anon went full autism mode

>be 15>in love with my best friend 17f>go on beach trip with a bunch of friends>she is laying on towel ass up>she says "anon I need someone to cuddle with come over here">freak out but go over>dunno how to cuddle, so I kinda lay half on top of her, across her>uhadtobethere.jpeg>she freaks out and yells get off>get off>she says what the fuck anon >"what did...

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Labor day

>labor day in the US>barbecue at friend's house>about 20 guests total, choice between ssb4 and pool>girls choose pool, guys choose vidya>set up game so loser rotates out, 3 stocks each>just before I can get on girls realize they aren't being fawned over and come inside>"lol let us play too! :3">boyfriends have no choice to agree>my turn finally arrives, load up as ganondorf>win...

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Mojave

>Be me>Living in a post-nuclear-war Mojave in Nivada at a small settlement>Doc up the hill fixes some mail man who got his face blown apart>Mail man comes into my shop>He has no visible scars even though I swear to God he had his head blown apart>Talks to me, and cuts me off every time I start a sentence>He sells all of his shit to me>I go from general goods store owner to...

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Bypass proxy

>be me in middle school>school has computer lab in the school library>little shit me got bored>decided to download a proxy on a usb to play games on miniclip>shithead next to me sees me playing billiards and asks how I did this>tell him I make hacks that can bypass school firewall>shithead asks if he could buy one from me>made five bucks that day>next day shithead and...

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Anon no longer virgin

>be me, 17 year old kissless virgin male >travel for few hours to visit girl best friend in far away lands >she is 8/10, quite attractive and very nice bum >we walk through the woods while chatting >I look at her bum when I can >I have a 3/5 erection from this >we stop to sit on bench. We've been walking for hours. >We chat there for two hours and my erection goes >She...

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girl from class

>be me>be 25 year old 6/10 kissless virgin>go to uni>girl in my class qt 3.14 10/10>she seems to like me>she sits beside me in class>she talks to me>we become friends>she invites me to her house>gladly accept>oh fuck man im gonna get it on>go there>shes fucking rich large ass mansion>o shit im a poor ass pleb why does she like me>i go inside>she greets...

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School tacos

>be me in 4th grade>in math class, desks are aligned in a u-shape in front of the teacher>anon sits the the end, crush sits across >had tacos, the shitty school lunch kind>my stomach starts hurting so I ask ms.teacher if I can go use the restroom>"no anon sit down" >"but miss! It's an emergency!!">"anon sit down I know you just want to get out of class">minutes...

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locked out

>be 18, living in an apartment>decide to go out for dinner>as I exit the apartment, realize I left my wallet inside>turn around to go back in>my stupid ass went out but forgets the key to the building>fortunately my stupid ass also forgot to lock my unit so it's just a matter of getting in>call landlord>she's asleep>call locksmith>can't help with apartment building...

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John from the Diner

>be 17>be working as a cashier at Price Chopper (grocery chain in the northeast US)>really need to take a shit but can't because it's busy>spot "John from the Diner">John from the Diner is a loose-cannon 50 year old severe retard who is cared for by his 80 year old mother/wrangler who ferries him everywhere>he is called John from the Diner because he frequented a small diner in...

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Camping with boy scouts

> Be me, 8 years old> Fat enough to truffle shuffle> Go on camping trip with my boy scout troop to a local camping ground over the weekend> Saturday night was a special ceremony> Love camping trips, but older guys in troop are alpha to me because I'm husky > also really fucking love skittles, and am forever called "skittle-tits"> Eat dinner, cry, fall asleep -- usual shit>...

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