> Sitting at desk typing invoices.
> Stomach starts to produce a constant gurgling sound.
> BLUB BLUB BLUBLE BLUB
> musthavetofart.png
> push.
> nothing comes out.
> five minutes later.
> BLUB BLUB GROWLLLL
> my stomach suddenly and violently contorts, twisting into an unnatural and inhuman shape.
> All I feel is pain.
> Death is the only release.
> The weight of shit pressing against my anus is unbearable.
> Imagine for a moment a large farm animal, lets say a half-ton bull trying to birth itself from your pink starfish.
> I stand up with the weight of the world on my shoulders
> Straining to hold back the unholy beast.
> slowly I begin to waddle towards the restroom.
> each step a victory won in this foul smelly war.
> As i plod my way down the hallway I am already taking of my belt and unbuttoning my pants.
> I am a robot.
> Machine level multitasking.
> DEX LVL 100.
> The belt and button are conquered.
> SHLOSH SHLOSH BLUB GURGLE
> I am opening the bathroom door now.
> The pants are sliding down.
> My ass is descending upon the throne
> PFFFBTBTDFTTTT.
> A sound like jet fuel melting steal beam.
> I've pooped on the back of the toilet seat.
> The liquid stream of butt mud is at first pressurized.
> Scientific estimations put it at a minimum of 350psi (24 bar)
> It is splashing up on the walls.
> It is splashing up on my balls.
> The rhythmic slapping of my butt cheeks has reached a perfect frequency.
> In harmony the windows rattle in their frames.
> The grout between the wall tiles crumbles and skitters across the floor.
> But as fast as the beast came... it passes.
> I spend the next 30 minutes dribbling a slow stream of shit.
> the burn has started.
> I am positive now that my butt is gone.
> there is only pelvis.
> the stream comes to an end.
> 15 baby wipes.
> half a roll of toilet paper.
> Everything is clean.
> Wash hands.
> Leave bathroom.
> Stomach starts gurgling.
> Repeat from step one.
