>I loved Kevin so much, I owned all the Despicable Me movies and merchandise
>I pray to Kevin every night, thanking him for the life I have been given
>"Kevin is love", I say, "Kevin is life"
>My dad hears me and says that Dave minion is master race
> He is obviously jealous of my devotion to Kevin
>I called him bananonina
> He slaps me and sends me to my room
> I am crying now, because my face hurts
> I go into my bed and it is very cold
>I feel a warmth moving towards me
> I fell something touch me
> It's Kevin
> I am so happy
> he whispers into my ear, "BEE DO BEE DO BEE DO BEE DO BEE DO"
> He grabs me with his tiny, three-fingered minion hands and puts me on my hands and knees
> I'm ready
> I spread my ass cheeks for Kevin
> "MUAK MUAK MUAK," Kevin says
> Kevin sticks his oval-shaped head into my butthole
> I can feel my anus tearing as my eyes start to water
> I push against his force
> I want to please Kevin
> He tells me "BANANA"
> I take out the shit-covered banana I penetrated myself with the previous night
> He burps a mighty burp as he digests the banana
> My dad walks in
> Kevin looks him deep in the eyes and says, "POOPAYE"
> Kevin leaves through my window
Kevin is love, Kevin is life
